To start off Pride month, we want to share Sally’s story. Sally Wall’s journey hasn’t been a straightforward one, but her inspirational strength and resilience have led her to Barrow and a career as a counsellor, helping others.
From the age of 13, Sally began to vividly visualise a young female figure who was calm, happy and peaceful. It was only later on that Sally realised that the figure was in fact herself.
With the help of her drama teacher at the age of 21 Sally began to recognise she was starting her own transgender journey. This began with many questions around identity and assigning thoughts to a particular gender, which was understandably a confusing time but she followed her teacher’s advice to ‘just let it happen’.
Sally explains:
“My transgender journey really started for me when I took away all expectations and I was so happy. I like to express myself through poetry and during this time I was writing and really beginning to find my true self.
I went through a huge mental and confidence growth spurt and started attending a LGB group, there was no T or Q+ at this time 30 years ago, but the group allowed conversations around sexuality and I was enjoying my life, but reality quickly caught up with me.”
Sally was accused of attention seeking, and wasn’t able to dress how she wanted.
Originally from Cambridge, she decided to move away to Luton to go to university for the chance to establish a new identity and find her own independence, but this proved to be difficult.
While studying in Luton, Sally was subjected to mental and physical abuse, including heckling, name calling, stalking and many occasions of physical assault including a broken jaw. Her support network was constantly worried she was in danger.
Sally’s self-confessed stubborn streak was a hidden strength, refusing to be silenced and throughout her time at university, she campaigned for her own rights, paving the way for future generations with rules changes being implemented as a result of her hard work.
Sally added:
“I knew one day I would be grateful for everything I have been through and that my future self would thank me. I do thank myself that I was strong and fought through the difficult times. I had to retake some modules but I left university with a 2:1 in my psychology degree and managed to reset some boundaries of what was possible, so I’m incredibly proud of myself.”
Starting work in the early 2000s came with challenges around the use of the toilets and changing areas. Sally was often faced with conflicting and changing messages and was often stopped from using the female facilities making her feel degraded, unwelcome and denying her social existence. Only when the Gender Recognition Act was introduced in 2004 did this become less difficult.
The purpose of this law is to provide transgender people with legal recognition in their acquired gender. Pursuing her counselling carer meant taking a placement in Dagenham in 2005. Before visiting a new area, many transgender people will profile the vicinity to make a judgement as to whether they will feel safe there. What Sally hoped would be a safe space for her ultimately wasn’t. During her short time in Dagenham, Sally was subject to instances of sexual harassment, threatening behaviour and physical violence, placing a huge strain on her mental wellbeing. So she decided to take a step back and enjoy family time with her daughter before restudying to qualify as a counsellor in 2011.
Sally continues:
“From that time onwards, socially things began to feel easier. I’m lucky to have such a supportive family including my mum, sisters and my daughter, who I am unbelievably proud of. I’ve worked at a variety of organisations including a homeless hostel and charity groups before joining LSCft last year and relocating to Barrow."
Sally concludes:
“Reaching out and asking for help is often the first and biggest hurdle but there is always somebody out there who can help and listen. Find support groups, join staff networks and if anybody wants to reach out and share their story with me I would be honoured.”
You can speak to Sally via the Kaleidoscope LGBT group in Barrow on 01229 812 888 or email drop_zone@ btconnect.com.
